My neck was swaying with the rooftops as my eyes were seduced by the artistic ensembles of colours, shapes and stories.Continue reading “Art on rooftops”
We all have that place that we can all escape to. Where everything makes sense and you’re always right even when you know you’re wrong. A perfect home for a person who is contempt with what they have and would not change it. We house all our secrets, thoughts, personalities……The safe place that is called “the comfort zone” that not even your mother can penetrate. Only you know that place. Continue reading “Safety in the zone…..”
These words have stuck with me ever since. Sometimes only the person who is close to you and knows your character is the person you need to turn to for some hard truths. Until I heard these words I was a busy body, all day everyday. Strange feelings overtook when I stood still. I didn’t understand stillness so my mind was always full of every kind of anxiety you can think of until my body said STOP!!!!!
Pulse rate high and nightsweats began….I had to receive validation that what I was doing was the right thing…it turns out not, all i did was burn out and forget about myself….spiritually, physically and emotionally. I neglected God, my body and my feelings which were empty.
So here comes the change life. I have stopped caring so much, doing so much and sparing my lovely emotions…who knew that they can kill. With a lighter head I can rest easy and be more selfish (the good kind).
Sometimes we need to stop and think if what we do is actually helping us or hurting us.
How can I show love with an empty spirit….I can’t..only God shows me how to love because He is love
How can I show love with a tired body….I can’t…hugs should always be warm and loving
How can I show love with an empty heart…..I can’t, I simply can’t
Take a break so you can show love again
Let me just be real for a minute. Not everything is great but I am thankful for the short times I have to breathe.
Being an assistant is never easy; you are just high demand all the time so blood pressure is just elevated a little bit. I still have days when I go home and say God I am greatful because without you I wouldn’t have landed this job. For anything I lack I know the Great I AM can give me strength.
I still remember the very first day that I started this job and how unbelievably focused I was. I just didn’t want to screw up; I am still like that today but it’s good to laugh now and again. My boss took a post-it note and wrote something I will never forget.
I always appreciate the little things people do for me no matter how small like when my sister gave me a hug because she saw I was stressed out; my boss wrote an encouraging note to help me relax; my mum made me soup when I am sick; my friend prayed for me when I was down; a stranger smiled at me when I had the most horrendous face on. Little things can be healing to the soul and bring tears to the heart. Things may be bad but just remember that there is a God that cares for you. I am not sure if I am doing this for you or to remind myself, but I hope you take it to heart.
I like cookies, all sorts of cookies, chocolate chip, raisin, peanut, smarties *drools*…if I had a blue onsie I would be the cookie monster everytime I brought a cookie home, sadly this post is not about cookies or comfortable onsies..it’s about being a jack of all trades, Hansie-my-kneg (Afrikaan), Homme-à-tout-faire (French), Tamokuteki wa Mugeidesu (Japanese), سبع صنايع والبخت ضايع (Arabic), too many cooks spoil the broth…….but master of none.
There is a reason why we study many subjects in school but then end up going to university level more specialised in one….we just don’t have the time, energy and capacity to be a professional in everything….I guess it’s time to pick one and be a genius at it rather than be mediocre at many. Well I know what my 2015 resolution is going to be…..a lot less thinking and more doing. The worst thing to be is a half baked cookie, you are not quite ready yet but you have the potential to be
delicious AWESOME. It’s important to dream but it’s even more important to align your dreams with reality…..if you can think it…it’s possible….find the means to make it possible. I will let you know how my French, guitar and song writing goes at the end of 2015…what will you do?
Inspiration on a journey again, only this time the carriage is empty. Funny how my moments of inspiration always happen when I am away from home. Tried to make peace with my past but it kept coming back to haunt me so finally I decided to confront it.
There was no sunshine when he had stayed, smelt of whiskey in the early morning, I wondered if the vomit stained vest clinging onto his beer belly was the future I had yet to realise. Disgusted and haunted and afraid. A silent child with no words to speak but “hello”. Oh how life you have robbed me off opportunities to engage in conversation, laugh and play and just be sane, instead I was entertained by the thoughts of death and its companions…or rather depressed at the thought. I remember that summer….the sun added a gold tint to my complexion and I lay on the sofa like a mad man would talking to a therapist, releasing their innermost thoughts to the professional, except there was no one. Just my imagination rewinding and playing death as I saw it. Move 4 years later and I hear loud voices attacking her, fists propelling faster than I could perceive, eyes larger than that ball with the dimples, oh yeah golf, oh yeah I should have taken the catalogue, oh yeah I should run to the door, oh yeah I mustn’t forget her, oh yeah her belly is absolutely round now. Continue reading “Forgiveness is the key….”