The day of cupid is around the corner and I find myself contemplating one thing as a millennial dilemma (well, constructed in my head).
What if my mature self leaves me with limited options? The older I get the more I know so naturally the more seasoned my options become, right?
Then I encountered a tall drink of water oozing with intelligence and confidence. I could not help but stare, and then he casually drops the child(ren) in the conversation. What should I expect from a 35+ year old man, a clean slate? So it made me wonder, it’s not the first time this has happened and probably won’t be the last so let’s talk. What if he has kids?
Am I prepared to be step mum? Do I want to deal with the baby mama drama? Does he want more kids? What if he’s looking for a mother for his kids…what if I become a nanny for his children T_T am I prepared for said responsibility? He sounded responsible but what if he isn’t good with kids and doesn’t want anymore? whilst not trying to sound like my youth was short lived, my short answer…no, long answer I will think about it some more.
The truth is, you can never know the answer to any of these because we all put up a front and behave well to give a good impression. Ultimately I become number 2 or 3 or 4 depending on the load and not number 1 which is my preferred position *Queening*. Can I humble myself and take the backseat whilst he steers the wheel into his already planned life? That’s hard and because it’s hard maybe I can let go of this path.
Yes all this ran through my head. It’s hard because people you have a connection/ share interests with are hard to find, especially in a transient city. In this day and age, being a single parent is not such a big deal like it used to be, as long as the child is loved. Sometimes we end up carrying someone’s load because life is not perfect but we can accept each other for who we are right now.
While all this was constructed in my head…I think it was worth the contemplation. What do you think?